So Much Information

What information do you trust...The Doctor gives you as much information as he can give and he sits there hoping that you are taking it all in. We just sit there and wonder is this really happening. He carries on talking and we sit and keep listening hoping hes wrong but of course with all the tests I've had he sure is.
Then you speak to people who have a family member who's had some form of cancer and you sit and listen because you don't want to be rude. Then you find out telling someone in confidence really isn't and you get a call from someone who has had Breast Cancer and wants to share with you and console you, this is someone that isn't a friend, you have never socialized with them and quiet frankly never would so I would discus this with you because? I make my excuses and say I am busy and that I promise to call them tomorrow and of course I never do.
This is the whole reason that I didn't tell anyone, I don't want to hear doom and gloom stories or any negatives or how I should feel and how I shouldn't. I will feel how I want to feel and will do what I want to and cope with it how I want to.
I was looking on the internet and found that you can buy false Eyebrows made out of real hair now that might be cool the advert says with proper care they can last 4 months...But what happens if your out and the glue gives up and your eyebrow starts to come unstuck how would you cope with that it would be like having a boggy hanging out of your nose and no one telling you...
Now the other thing is the make-up. I know that some people cannot get out of bed in the morning without putting make-up but I'm the one person who doesn't I have on occasion, like my wedding and the odd business meeting but every day nah don't have time there are way to many things happening to waste time doing that. So why would I bother just because I've got bald head no eyebrows or lashes would I dress it up.
I don't think I could wear a wig, I mean I live in Florida it would be all itchy and the heat nope not an option. Think I'm going for sexy hates and scarves that will defo work for me and you never know it might grow back lush and sexy.
Monday is the mugga scan so Ill do another post then and let you know how it went.

Tuesday's Appt

Today was the appt with the Oncologist to see what happens next and for him to explain again what I have as it seems I was confused...Not. 


One the first appt he told me that I wouldn't be loosing my hair but it appears with this cocktail of drugs yes I will be. So as much as my hair has been the bain of my of my life it still makes me and Ive worked hard to grow my fringe/bangs out and get my hair all one length and now I'm told it will be gone within a week of the chemo so this is a little sicking but if it saves me I don't care as long as I live till I'm 100 take the hair.


So my Chemo starts on the 8th November 2010 but first I need to have a Muga Scan:

The MUGA scan (MUltiple Gated Acquisition scan) is a noninvasive test that produces a moving image of the heart. From this image, the health of the heart’s major pumping chamber (the left ventricle) can be assessed.

A MUGA scan is performed by attaching a radioactive substance, Technetium 99, to red blood cells, then injecting the red blood cells into the patient’s bloodstream. (The level of radiation to which a patient is exposed during this test is considered minimal.) The patient is then placed under a special camera (a gamma camera), and with some fancy computer manipulation, a “movie” of the beating heart is made. From this moving image, the MUGA scan gives an accurate and reproducible way to measure the ejection fraction of the left ventricle.

The left ventricular ejection fraction (LVEF) is an excellent measure of overall cardiac function. The ejection fraction is simply the proportion of blood that is expelled from the ventricle with each heart beat. So, for instance, if the left ventricl ejects 60% of its blood volume with each beat, the LVEF is 0.6. (A normal LVEF is 0.5 or greater.)

While there are other ways to measure the LVEF (such as the echocardiogram), the MUGA scan measures it more accurately than any other method. In situations where it is important to detect minor changes in a patient’s LVEF – such as in following patients receiving Adriamycin – most experts believe the MUGA scan is the best test available.

This I will be having Monday 1st and then Chemo starts following Monday 8th 2010

The drugs I will be taking will be Herceptin along with Docetaxel (Taxotere) and Carboplatin (Paraplatin)

These will be inserted through the Medi-port and will take 3 hours at a time.

Once the doctor had finished with us we were taken to seen the Nurse and was given leaflets and a lovely booklet full of old lady wigs and hats not really my style. Not sure they would be anyones in this 21st Century. She also tried to give me a book on how to apply make up....Ive not worn make up for years and at the end of the day why would I dress up a bald head that looks like a Boiled Egg, only at Easter should this be done.

As I was sitting there and looking around the room there couldn't have been anyone under the age of 70 I was the youngest thats for sure.

At the moment we are at All Children's Hospital waiting for my son to come out of surgery so until he is all ok I'm not thinking of me my son comes first.

Ill post some more over the weekend once Ive done some reading.

Well Here we go again

Apparently I am not Her2-Negative...After a call from the Oncologist today I find out that I am after all Her2-Positive and so I will not be taking Adventist I will be taking :


What is Herceptin?
Herceptin (trastuzumab) is a treatment for women with breast cancer whose tumors have too much HER2 protein. This type of cancer is known as "HER2-positive," "HER2+," or "HER2-overexpressing." HER2+ tumors tend to grow and spread more quickly than tumors that are not HER2+. This is why it is so important to find out your cancer's HER2 status. ^1,2
Clinical experience with Herceptin for the adjuvant treatment of HER2+ breast cancer began in 2000. ² In 2006, Herceptin was approved for the adjuvant treatment of HER2+ breast cancer. ¹

Who is Herceptin for?

Herceptin is approved for the adjuvant treatment of HER2-overexpressing, node-positive or node-negative (ER/PR-negative or with one high-risk feature)^† breast cancer. Herceptin can be used several different ways:

• As part of a treatment regimen including doxorubicin, cyclophosphamide, and either paclitaxel or docetaxel
• With docetaxel and carboplatin
• As a single agent following multi-modality anthracycline-based therapy

† High-risk is defined as ER/PR positive with one of the following features: tumor size >2 cm, age <35 years, or tumor grade 2 or 3.

High-risk features are defined as ER/PR+ with one of the following characteristics:

• Age less than 35 years
• Tumor size larger than 2 cm wide
• Tumor grade 2/3

So now we are on the same page as everyone now apparently with this cancer is the only choice.

My next appt is Tuesday to find out more and see when the treatment starts. There does seem to be a lot of side affects with this ...Very worrying to say the least.

Thursday Morning 10/21/2010

Well did not sleep to well last night. You can defo feel that Medi-port in your chest. I hope once its healed you forget its there because this is a strange feeling. Its bruised and hurt more then having the tumor removed from my right breast. Its still not as painful as giving birth so I'm sure we will get through it.


I hope the Oncologist calls back today so we can ask him some questions and get on the right page of what is happening and what drugs I will be taking.


I was also mean to my husband yesterday and said something nasty so Im putting it print that I'm sorry it wasn't meant but this crap is getting harder to take and I'd just rather wake up from this very bad dream and get on with my life and look after my family! So I'm sorry Michael 

Medi Port Day

Well no food or drink before op oh joy lol


Arrived at hospital for the 10.00am booking in. Don't know why but out of all the ops in the last couple of weeks I really didn't want to have this one at all.


After getting booked in Terri the RN nurse came to get me and seeing her smiling face makes it all better. Not only is she a friend shes a very sweet woman who has also been through a double mastectomy and chemo and so knows what its like, even though mine is nothing like hers I feel such a wimp compared. 


After getting changed into the backless gown and wrapped in warm blankets and having an IV inserted and then all the magic is pumped through then, the surgeon came through and we had a joke, regarding a Armadillo digging up his lawn and how his dogs chased it. Makes it all so much easier when everyone is not serious and we can get through the day.
Then the anesthetist comes in and starts talking about while the op is on if I feel pain to put my hand up! This did start to freak me out but Terri assured me that I will defo be out of it and not to worry that he was only doing his job. Well he didn't make me feel too great....


I'm then lead into the theater and that was it as I woke up it seemed as if I'd only just gone down but in fact I was done and dusted. The pain from this in my shoulder/chest hurts more then it did having my boobs operated on and even now as I sit here with an icepack on it and had to take a Advil cause my head was banging and so was my chest.


I'm defo not looking forward to this whole chemo thing and just want to move on and book a holiday pack the animals up and go on a road trip and party....


I don't know when the chemo starts or how long it will take on the day some say an hour some say up to 7 hours...How can I sit there that long....


I have a picture but its not great as I'm covered in the yellow stuff. Im hoping my husband will spend the night taking it off lol

  

Appt Today Monday 18th 2010

Well today I went to my follow up appointment for the surgeon to check out how I was healing. While I was there he informed me that the cancer doctor had called him and wanted me to get the mediport inserted asap. So I'm booked in for Wednesday. 


I will go in and be put under so it can be fitted because I didn't want to be awake for this one and defo not looking forward to it.


I spent most of the afternoon and evening at All Children's Hospital with my son as he is having surgery next Wednesday for his back so its been a busy time for us all and I'm totally worn out right now. I just need to get him through his op and on the road to recovery and then I can think about me.


Will post again so you know what is going on.

A port (sometimes called by brand names such as Port-a-cath or Mediport) inserted in your chest during a short outpatient surgery. A port is a small disc made of plastic or metal about the size of a quarter that sits just under the skin. A soft thin tube called a catheter connects the port to a large vein. Your chemotherapy medicines are given through a special needle that fits right into the port. You also can have blood drawn through the port. When all your cycles of chemotherapy are done, the port is removed during another short outpatient procedure.

Oncologist Meeting

All I can say is what a lovely man...Not a clock watcher just reassuring. When I arrived for my appointment, the first thing was to have some bloods taken and the lovely man that took it never felt a thing. He said he had done it every day for 30 years and boy could you tell. After that had a little check up with a nurse and then waited for the doctor. Who started to explain what was going to happen and there I am again sitting there in a world of my own wondering what is he saying, does he mean me surely not as hes telling me that I will need chemo and then radiation and also another drug to break up the cells.


 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xmlYr1AGx8


He then asks where my husband is and I explain what happened that day and how he had been delayed and was on his way. So he said ok let me go and do something and we will wait as I think he should be here with you. He was so kind and explained everything so well even though I wasn't with it!


So the upshot is. First I need a medi port fitted and then chemo starts....This date I do not know until my boob has healed (which it is at a rapid rate) and once I have the medi port fitted I'm sure it will happened asap.


In the mean time my 15 year old has to have back surgery and hes my pain worry right now and as long as all goes well with him then I can start to look after me and get fighting cause I do have a wonderful life. A man that loves me, a JOB that I love and kids that Ive always wanted more then anything so I will win this and come through the other side a much better person then the one that went in. 


Watch this space as I go through the next year......

Follow Up Appointment

So off we go to get the drain removed and hear what the surgeon found and whats next....


We this is were it gets crappy. Apparently I have HER2-negative gene and so a whole new ball game comes into play.....Not just radiation now.


So now I have to go and see an oncologist and see whats next....

2nd Surgery

So today is going to be a bit different....First off I have to have a scan to see where my lymph nodes are and enable the surgeon to take the two he needs....


First they injected the nipple with the blue dye radiation so that when they put me in the machine it shows up where everything is.


Once this is done its time for the magic drugs again to put you out and let the surgeon do his work.


When I woke up yes it was painful it a weird sort of why but I think this time it was worse and I did cry for the first time as I finally realised that it was really happening and why me. I have never smoked or drank and leaved a clean life. Been on a diet lost loads of weight and now this....


The gave me some pain meds and boy did this make me sick so then they had to give me something to stop me being sick....


We finally got home 3.30pm in time for the school bus to get my daughter.


I had a drain in and this was horrible having to strip it each time to keep the liquid flowing out. The did arrange for a nurse to come in but one morning of her was enough for me and my husband took over as he is the best ever.


This picture is 15 days after there is no way I could have posted it before...

Now for the News

Week later I go back to see the surgeon and he tells me. Yes the tumor was cancer and I have two choices! Take the boob off or have (Lumpectomy is a surgical procedure that involves removing a suspected malignant (cancerous) tumor, or lump, and a small portion of the surrounding tissue from a woman's breast. This tissue is then tested to determine if it contains cancerous cells. A number of lymph nodes may also be removed to test them for cancerous cells (sentinel lymph node biopsy or axillary dissection). If cancerous cells are discovered in the tissue sample or nodes, additional surgery or treatment may be necessary. Women who undergo a lumpectomy normally receive radiation therapy.) I asked his advice and he said there was no need to have the boob off as it would be the same outcome. So I decided on the Lumpectomy. So surgery was booked.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUoqsBxgXWI

First Surgery

We arrive at the hospital and get checked in. The I'm taken through to get changed then have an Ultra-sound so they can insert a wire into my boob to pin point the lump so the surgeon can go in and take it straight out.


Now that was not painful, after having two kids I don't think anything compares to that pain lol


After this I have an IV put in and given some nice sleep time and when I wake the lump is out and my boob is all glued up and looking nastie.


My husband comes to collect me and off we go home. We have not told the kids at all as there was no point in them worrying if its nothing. Also if Im honest if we dont talk about it perhaps its not happening!

What Happened?

Every year I have a mammogram as I have those big boobs that you could feel around for days and they would always feel lumpy and bumpy. 2009 I went for the yearly visit and was told that there was something there but its a calcium deposit nothing to worry about, but to be sure lets do an ultra-sound. Once again had it done and nothing so worry over:) 


I'm asked to go back in 6 months just to keep a watch over that Right Boob! So off I go in February 2010 have the mammogram and again the calcium is still sitting there but nothing to worry about... See you in 6 months.


So here I am 30th August waiting to have the mammogram and once again its done only this time I'm called back for a Bi-Lateral exam. All done off I go home. Then I'm called again and asked to go back in for an Ultra-Sound, but I'm still not panicking as I'm laying there watching her going over the same spot. All done and I'm told I will hear from the doctor with the results.


The local doctor's assistant calls and we make an appointment, I go in and the old crusty nurse takes my weight and blood pressure same old chit chat. Then walks in the Physicians assistance and goes on to tell me out of the blue that I have a 50/50 chance of making it and not to worry as her sister has had breast cancer and shes still here. I can hear her saying all this but I'm not really if you know what I mean. She then goes on to tell me that she recommends this other surgeon, who I've never heard of or know but she will save my life! As I sit there and ask why can't the other doctor who I have used before do it, oh no you don't want to trust them you need to use who I say. Well I did call that doctor from the car as I sat outside in a daze wondering what I had just heard. I did called and was told the doctor was on vacation and they wouldn't be able to slot me until a week later! So I called the Surgeon that I had used before. The nurses are always lovely and ask soon as I said what had happened she got me in a day later. Ill call this doctor Peter as hes lovely and it would be fair to use his real name in a blog. He explained everything to me and said that no one new it was 50/50 until he had operated and tested the tumor to see what it was. 


Surgery booked for 4 days later!